the past is a ghost, the future a dream.

~ Monday, November 23 ~
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Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes – the ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules and they have no respect for the status quo. You can praise them, disagree with them, quote them, disbelieve them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing that you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things.

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~ Sunday, November 22 ~
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I’ve made mistakes in my life. I’ve let people take advantage of me and I’ve accepted way less than what I deserve. But, I’ve learned from my bad choices and even though there are some things I can never get back and people who will never be sorry. I know better next time and won’t settle for anything less than what I deserve.

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We walk around talking to complete strangers; laugh for absolutely no reason at all ; have stupid fights that are over in ten minutes ; attempt to dance and sing like they do in the music videos ; have a billion ‘you had to be there” times ; gang up on the bitch that has a problem with one of us ; make fun of each other when we walk into stuff ; act like we’re on crack ; and no matter what happens we’re always there for each other through good times and bad.

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I want someone. Who won’t care that I’m incapable of sitting still that I can’t grasp the concept of cleaning and I refuse to be ladylike. Someone who realises that half the decisions I make are usually the ones I regret. And I have the right to overreact at any given moment. I want someone who knows how completely insane I am and he wouldn’t want me any other way.

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Never say someone completes you. We have to feel whole even when we are by ourselves; for needing a certain someone is not love, but dependency. Wanting a person to become a part of your life is the best reason for having them. So rather than search for the one who will complete you, wait for the person that will compliment your completeness.

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What’s teenage love? It’s staying up late for each other and barely staying awake in class the next day. It’s passing each other between classes and stopping to say hi but ending up running to your next class just before the bell rings. It’s going to the mall wandering around hand in hand, with a silence that’s comfortable. It’s watching a movie in the theatres with his arm slowly creeping onto your shoulders and resting your head in his arms. It’s walking around at night, for no reason at all, his chest, her head, looking at the stars. It’s uncertainty of how long it will last, a risk your both willing to take, even if it means you’ll have a broken heart. It’s not yet true love, not like, not lust, nor infatuation. It’s teenage love, here to stay, here to play with our hearts and never to go away.

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Love is when you cry tears over him and still want him. It’s when he ignores you and you still love him. It’s when he loves another girl but you still smile and say “I’m happy for you” when all you really do is cry.

~ Saturday, November 21 ~
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Love is when you find; someone you can really be yourself with that you can share anything with like a best friend. It’s when you can’t even imagine what your life would be without the other person. When words do not even come close to how you really feel and even though it doesn’t make sense to other people. You know you’re meant you be together.

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Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build all these defences. You build up this whole armour, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life… you give them a piece of you. They don’t ask for it. They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like ‘maybe we should just be friends’ or “how very perceptive” turns into a glass splinter working its way to your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul hurt, a body hurt, a real gets in you and rips you apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love.

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That thing when you kiss someone and everything around you becomes hazy, and the only thing is you and that person, and you should realise that this is the only person that you should be kissing for the rest of your life and for that one moment you get this amazing gift, all cause you feel so lucky that you’ve found it, but so scared that it’ll go away at the same time.

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I love you enough to fight for you, compromise for you, and sacrifice myself for you if need be. Enough to miss you incredibly when we’re apart, no matter what length of time it’s for and regardless of the distance. Enough to believe in our relationship, to stand by it through the worst of times, to have faith in our strength as a couple, and to never give up on us. Enough to spend the rest of my life with you, be there for you when you need or want me, and never, ever want to leave you or live without you. I love you this much.

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You aren’t going to his first, his last, or his only.. he’s loved before, he will again. But if he loves you now, what else matters? He’s not perfect, you aren’t either and the two of you will never be perfect; but if he can make you laugh at least once, cause to think twice, and admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He is not going to quote poetry, he’s not going to be thinking about you every moment but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break; don’t hurt him, don’t change him.. don’t expect more than he can give. Try not to over analyse.. smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad.. and miss him when he’s not there.

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Love; when you see him, no… your heart doesn’t skip a beat… it jumps two beats. When you hear his name, no you don’t ask for his last name, when you say his whole name and ask if that’s the right one. When you hear his voice, you don’t smile.. you cry and tear of happiness and smile. Love captures the heart, it takes all the bad and turns it to good. Love can be explained in so many ways, but the easiest way for me to explain it was to just say his name. But then it wouldn’t be a secret would it?

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~ Friday, November 20 ~
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Everyone says that love hurts, but that’s not true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Everyone confuse these things with love, but in reality, love is the only thing in the world that covers up all the pain and makes us feel wonderful again.

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I ask for strength and God gave me difficulties to make me strong. I asked for wisdom and God gave me problems to solve. I asked for prosperity and God gave me brain and energy to work. I asked for courage and God have me danger to overcome. I asked for love and God gave me troubled people to help. I asked for favours and God gave me opportunities. I received nothing I wanted, but I received everything I needed.

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